Yesterday I woke up and realised that something terrible has happened.
I missed the end of the world.
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No, seriously. Remember Harold Camping? The guy I wrote about in Armageddon that Didn't Happen and Apocalypse Schmapocalypse? After his May 21 Rapture failed to materialise, he annouced that it's only 6 months respite and the world will actually end on October 21.
You may have noticed (from the articles above if nothing else) how I'm a huge Camping fan. I find it amazing that the guy preaches, is heard and given money. Real, tangible, cold cash, paid to Camping's organisation in hope of (I presume) redemption before the Big Day. Un-be-lie-va-ble.
With all that, I simply missed the Apocalypse. I didn't notice it happening in any way whatsoever, so... I forgot. I completely ignored the Big Day.
Now, that's the kind of Armageddon I like.
Showing posts with label apocalypse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label apocalypse. Show all posts
Tuesday, 13 December 2011
Tuesday, 19 July 2011
Armageddon that didn't happen
Armageddon and all sorts of Apocalypses are some of my favourite subjects. I love catastrophic movies, and I have this particular trait - I dream in disasters. Earthquakes, volcanoes, wars, plane crashes, pandemies, tsunamis, you name it - my dreams have it all. Once I was rather scared by all this mayhem and woke shuddering every second night or so, now I got used to my dreaming patterns and treat it more like my very own movie theatre.
I follow a few volcanic/catastrophic blogs and watched BBC non stop for a day or two right after the Japanese earthquake happened. Disasters are awe-inspiring in their power. I even wrote an article listing the likely and the unlikely ways in which the end of our times may arrive.
But I draw a line at Harold Campings of this world. Long before Camping's promised Rapture Day, I was wondering - where will the poor guy hide on May 22nd? Or will he be cheeky enough to emerge in public and say something like - oops, miscalculation (guess what - he did just that!).
Anyway, May 21st came and went, and I vented my feelings here, right after the ominous date.
I follow a few volcanic/catastrophic blogs and watched BBC non stop for a day or two right after the Japanese earthquake happened. Disasters are awe-inspiring in their power. I even wrote an article listing the likely and the unlikely ways in which the end of our times may arrive.
But I draw a line at Harold Campings of this world. Long before Camping's promised Rapture Day, I was wondering - where will the poor guy hide on May 22nd? Or will he be cheeky enough to emerge in public and say something like - oops, miscalculation (guess what - he did just that!).
Anyway, May 21st came and went, and I vented my feelings here, right after the ominous date.
Thursday, 26 May 2011
Apocalypse, cancelled
Oops, it looks like the Apocalypse didn't happen again.
If you sold or gave away all your belongings to celebrate the big day and now find yourself in deep slurry - serves you well for being such an idiot.
I think it's an unbelievable, amazing phenomenon - take the biggest looney you can find, tell him to preach the most ridiculous bullshit you can imagine, and there still be thousands of people running, RUNNING, to give him money. Jaw-dropping unbelievable.
All that in the world with hunger, cancer, homelessness etc... Don't feed a beggar, pay a thousand dollars for a billboard, to make people aware of the coming Armageddon. The Armageddon somehow didn't materialise, and there's no sign of Christ anywhere, either, but who cares, right? There will be more looneys like Harold Camping and they too will make fortunes out of their stories, and there will still be people waving their credit cards to support theit cause.
What a wacky world we live in.
Would I make money too if I suddenly announced here on this blog that the angel told me of the SURE and CERTAIN date for the next Apocalypse, say November 11? Would I become an instant celebrity with piles of cash on my account? Would you donate you hard earned money, dear reader, to support my claim? I wish you would, but somehow I'm convinced that you wouldn't.
How unfair.
And I'm prettier than Harold Camping, too.
If you sold or gave away all your belongings to celebrate the big day and now find yourself in deep slurry - serves you well for being such an idiot.
I think it's an unbelievable, amazing phenomenon - take the biggest looney you can find, tell him to preach the most ridiculous bullshit you can imagine, and there still be thousands of people running, RUNNING, to give him money. Jaw-dropping unbelievable.
All that in the world with hunger, cancer, homelessness etc... Don't feed a beggar, pay a thousand dollars for a billboard, to make people aware of the coming Armageddon. The Armageddon somehow didn't materialise, and there's no sign of Christ anywhere, either, but who cares, right? There will be more looneys like Harold Camping and they too will make fortunes out of their stories, and there will still be people waving their credit cards to support theit cause.
What a wacky world we live in.
Would I make money too if I suddenly announced here on this blog that the angel told me of the SURE and CERTAIN date for the next Apocalypse, say November 11? Would I become an instant celebrity with piles of cash on my account? Would you donate you hard earned money, dear reader, to support my claim? I wish you would, but somehow I'm convinced that you wouldn't.
How unfair.
And I'm prettier than Harold Camping, too.
Wednesday, 11 May 2011
The End of the World
Apparently, the world is going to end pretty soon. On the 21st of May, to be precise.
See, checking top Google keywords from time to time can really broaden your horizons. Now I can quickly run to a bank, get a huge loan and I still have almost two weeks for splashing it out in the most pleasurable ways.
Or maybe I should decide that some religious looneys hunting for hidden messages in the Bible are not that trustworthy after all and I might end up with a huge loan to pay.
See, that's the trick with Armageddon. It's been promised so many times that no one really believes it anymore.
I have a suspicious feeling that the proper one will not be foreseen by anyone and none of us will have a chance to get this loan, unfortunately.
In the meantime, it's really enjoyable to hunt for the most recent prophets. I only wonder how badly will their career suffer if nothing happens... I nearly feel sorry for them.
Oh, and did you know that Rome is scheduled to be flattened out today by a huge earthquake? It got so much publicity that a dramatic rise in school and work leaves has been noted. Well, the spring is in full bloom, the weather balmy and a day out in the country will do everyone good, so maybe we should have more of those predictions?
And if you want to find some really good stuff about the End, read Terry Pratchett or Douglas Adams. Much more enjoyable than paranoid scenarioes of the Bible-groupies.
See, checking top Google keywords from time to time can really broaden your horizons. Now I can quickly run to a bank, get a huge loan and I still have almost two weeks for splashing it out in the most pleasurable ways.
Or maybe I should decide that some religious looneys hunting for hidden messages in the Bible are not that trustworthy after all and I might end up with a huge loan to pay.
See, that's the trick with Armageddon. It's been promised so many times that no one really believes it anymore.
I have a suspicious feeling that the proper one will not be foreseen by anyone and none of us will have a chance to get this loan, unfortunately.
In the meantime, it's really enjoyable to hunt for the most recent prophets. I only wonder how badly will their career suffer if nothing happens... I nearly feel sorry for them.
Oh, and did you know that Rome is scheduled to be flattened out today by a huge earthquake? It got so much publicity that a dramatic rise in school and work leaves has been noted. Well, the spring is in full bloom, the weather balmy and a day out in the country will do everyone good, so maybe we should have more of those predictions?
And if you want to find some really good stuff about the End, read Terry Pratchett or Douglas Adams. Much more enjoyable than paranoid scenarioes of the Bible-groupies.
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